Shopping for Your Wedding Dress: Timeline, Appointments, and Budget

Dress shopping is the part of wedding planning most people picture first, and the part where a little knowledge saves a lot of stress - and money. This article is about the shopping itself; for the different routes (off-the-peg, made-to-measure, sample, pre-loved) and what alterations cost, see made-to-measure vs. off-the-peg vs. alterations.

When to start

Around 9 to 12 months before the wedding is the sweet spot. Many boutique dresses take four to six months to arrive after you order, and alterations take another two or three months after that, so you want to have ordered by about eight months out. Start much earlier and you risk falling for something else later (it happens a lot); start much later and you're limited to dresses that are in stock. If you're on a short timeline, tell every boutique when you book - many have dresses they can sell off the rail or order quickly.

Booking boutique appointments

• Book ahead, especially for weekends. Saturday appointments at popular boutiques can be booked up weeks in advance. Weekday appointments are often longer, quieter, and less rushed.
• Expect around an hour to an hour and a half, with a consultant pulling dresses based on what you tell them. Some boutiques charge an appointment fee, often refunded or taken off the price if you buy - ask when booking.
• Ask about sizes and budget when you book. Boutiques order in sample dresses in a limited range of sizes, which they clip or pin to fit you. Many now carry a wider range - if you'd like to try samples close to your size, say so. And give the boutique your real budget so they don't show you dresses you can't afford.
• Visit two to four boutiques with different styles and price points, rather than ten. Decision fatigue is real, and after a certain point every dress starts to look the same.

Who to bring, and what to bring

Bring one to three people whose taste you trust and who'll be honest but kind. A big group means a dozen opinions and very little room for your own. Some brides go to the first appointment alone or with one person, and bring the wider group back for a final look.

Bring with you: seamless underwear and a strapless or multiway bra, shoes roughly the heel height you're planning to wear, photos of your venue, and a few images of dresses you like - but stay open-minded. The shape that looks best in photos online isn't always the one that looks best on you, and consultants are good at spotting that.

The "this is the one" moment - and what to check before you pay

There's often gentle pressure to decide on the day, sometimes with a discount if you order there and then. A good dress will still be a good dress tomorrow. Before you sign, check:

• The delivery date, in writing, and what happens if the dress arrives late or with a fault.
• The deposit and balance - many boutiques take a substantial deposit when you order (often around half) and the balance when the dress arrives. Deposits are usually non-refundable once the dress is ordered, because it's made for you.
• How your size will be chosen. Dresses are normally ordered from your measurements using the designer's size chart. Ask the consultant to show you which size they're ordering and why, especially if your measurements fall between sizes - it's much easier to take a dress in than let it out.
• What alterations cost and who does them - in-house, recommended, or up to you.
• How you're paying. Paying at least part of the price by credit card can give you extra protection if the business fails before your dress arrives - see the note on section 75 in vendor booking order.

Other ways to buy

• Sample sales and off-the-rail dresses - boutiques sell their sample dresses at a discount, often at set sales. Good value and quick, but check closely for wear, marks, and missing beads, and remember a sample may be quite different from your size.
• Pre-loved - bridal resale sites and dress agencies sell dresses worn once. Ask for measurements, not just the label size, because the dress may already have been altered, and get a rough alterations quote before you buy.
• High street and designer diffusion lines - increasingly good, much cheaper, and available quickly. Bridebook's guide puts high street bridal at roughly £100 to £1,000.
• Buying online - convenient, but be wary of sites selling famous designer dresses at a fraction of the price, which are often counterfeit and can arrive looking nothing like the photos. Designers list their authorised stockists on their own websites; if a seller isn't on the list, be very cautious.

While you're shopping, think about...

• The whole day, not just the aisle. Can you sit, dance, and go to the loo in it? Can the train be bustled for the evening? How will it cope with the weather and the venue (see choosing fabric for British weather)?
• A second outfit. Some brides change into something lighter for the evening. If you're tempted, factor it into the budget now.
• The accessories. A veil, headpiece, and jewellery can add a few hundred pounds - see veils, headpieces, and accessories.
• Your shoes, which need to be bought before your first fitting - see shoes and comfort.

What I'd actually do

Book your first appointment somewhere with a wide range of styles, try on at least one dress you'd never have picked yourself, and don't buy on the first day unless you're genuinely certain. Then, from someone who spends her working life altering them: when you've found it, ask the boutique what the dress is made of and how it's constructed. Lace, beading, and layers all make alterations more involved, and knowing that early helps you budget properly.