Invitation Wording and Etiquette

Invitation wording feels like it should be simple and somehow never is, mostly because it's the first place several sensitive decisions become visible to your guests all at once: who's hosting, who's invited, and what's expected of them.

Basic structure that covers most UK weddings: who's hosting (traditionally the couple's parents, though it's now very commonly the couple themselves, or a mix), the couple's names, the request to attend, the venue and time for the ceremony, and - if the reception is elsewhere or at a different time - reception details either on the same card or a separate insert. Keep the core wording simple; save personality and styling for the design, not for cramming extra information into the main text.

The questions that come up every time:

• Plus-ones - decide this as a policy, not case by case, or you'll create visible inconsistency that guests notice and compare notes on. "Partners" is usually meant to mean established relationships (married, engaged, living together, long-term) rather than a blanket "bring anyone" - if that's your intent, say so on the invitation rather than leaving guests to guess and ask.
• Children - if children aren't invited, this needs to be clear from how the invitation is addressed (naming the specific invited guests, not "and family"), ideally reinforced with a polite line on your wedding website or RSVP if you have one, since addressing conventions alone don't always land the message.
• Dietary requirements and RSVP details - build a clear place to collect these on your RSVP, whether that's a card, a wedding website form, or both, and set a genuine deadline that gives your caterer enough lead time - see the wedding breakfast for why final numbers matter more than people expect.
• Gift lists - a gift list can be mentioned on a separate insert or your wedding website, but etiquette convention still generally avoids putting it directly on the invitation itself.

On timing, send save-the-dates as soon as your venue and date are confirmed, particularly for a wedding with many guests travelling, then formal invitations somewhere in the range of 2-4 months ahead - toward the earlier end (or beyond) if it's a destination wedding within the UK requiring guests to book accommodation or time off well in advance, and note that some stationers and etiquette guides suggest going even earlier than that, so treat this as a floor rather than a fixed rule.